Hi! Anybody still here? I’m not sure how to
begin this post. “It’s been a long time” seems like the understatement of the
year so far. But I’m sure you can guess what’s been keeping me away:
Meet Raphaël, born on October 2nd,
2012. Laurent and I feel blessed everyday to have this little guy in our lives.
I’m sure every parent says this, but he really is the sweetest little baby in
the world! At four months, he’s been sleeping through the night for quite some
time now (despite a three-week holiday trip to Europe
and the ensuing jet-lag). He never went through his “inconsolable crying phase.”
In fact, he hardly ever cries unless there’s an easily identifiable reason –
usually that he’s hungry, gassy, or tired. And he just smiles and chatters all
the time! We love him to pieces.
I recently had a conversation
with a young woman who was saying that she didn’t feel emotionally ready to
have kids yet. My answer was that, even though having a baby was a
hundred-percent planned in my case, I never felt ready either! I knew I wanted
to have children, and I knew I wanted to have them sooner rather than later.
But does that mean I was prepared for everything being a mother entailed?
Absolutely not. I still have trouble thinking of myself as a mother! But the
thing is, I never expected to be completely ready: becoming a parent has always
seemed like such a huge, life-altering event, that I figured I would never be entirely
ready for it, no matter how much I prepared for it. I read up on the basic health-related
topics, but for the most part, I knew I was probably going to have to ad-lib my
way through it.
And that’s the way it’s been.
There’s a moment I think every new parent goes through: it’s when you get home
from the hospital, with your baby in your arms, and you look at each other and
think “Ok, what do we do now?”. Obviously, nothing will ever be the same. But
how exactly do you navigate that? So you put the baby down and you watch him
sleep for a while, and then you start wondering if you’re allowed to go do
something as mundane as have a cup of tea, or read the paper. Of course, this
state of uncertainty doesn’t last long: the baby soon wakes up crying, and
you’re off trying to figure out what’s the matter and what to do about it. And
just like that, you’re a parent. You eventually figure out that you can still
have a cup of tea while perusing the paper (in fact, moments like that
eventually become essential to your sanity), but now a huge part of your life
is dedicated to caring for this tiny, completely dependent being. The challenge
is balancing everything.
I didn’t do a great job at
balancing things in the beginning. I’m very lucky that Laurent was able and
willing to take over pretty much everything in the early days: shopping,
cooking, cleaning, he did it all, while I devoted myself to Raphaël. So, even
if I’d had time to blog, I wouldn’t have had much to blog about: I didn’t touch
a skillet or mixing bowl for months.
All newborns are very demanding in the beginning, but
in our case there was one aspect that complicated our first weeks together, and
took up nearly all of my time: breastfeeding. I know this is technically a
cooking blog, but mother’s milk is, after all, our first source of nourishment,
in most cases. And the breastfeeding experience has taken both me and Raphaël
for quite the ride. I thought I would share it today, to stall for time while I
get my butt back in the kitchen. Those of you who don’t feel like reading about
it can just scroll through the chronological photos of the baby. :-)